eyeAsk: Do We Make Ourselves Love?

This question has been heavy on my mind for a while. I know that love is one of the most powerful words and it can evoke a ton of emotions, actions, and just things in general when used. But sometimes I can't help but to think that people make themselves love or fall in love with others. It may not be a bad thing, but is love just supposed to happen naturally? God wants us to love our brothers and sisters, and everyone else in the world, but how are we supposed to do that? That is a rhetorical question and I could go on and on about that topic so I'll save it for another blog.

I think a lot of times people get fixated with people when they tell them that they love them. For example, if you're in a relationship and the person tells you that they love you or that they're in love with you, what do you say? What do you do? If you're not on the same level as them you may tell them that, but then I think something happens where you start to think like "wow they love me, should I love them" and it's just like love smacks you in the face. So eventually you end up loving that person, and it may not be because you are truly in love with them, but maybe because they told you and you just felt that it would be easier to love them since they love you. I think that people telling you they love you also speeds up your process of getting to know them or you just "skip steps" just to get to that point.

I don't know if I'm coming off clear here at all, but I hope someone understands where I'm coming from. I think the same thing can go for family as well. I feel that people think that they should automatically love their mother, father, and just family in general because that's their family. I don't feel like that should be the case, because although you may have been brought into this family with love and support in the things you do, sometimes I feel like it's hard to do so. I personally don't love a lot of people in my family, and I have been told "I love you" from about two to three people in my family in my whole life. This makes it hard for me to love others because when you've never been told I love you, you start to wonder and then after a while you just get used to it.

I believe that when people aren't loved and feel like they don't need to love anyone who doesn't love them, they reach out to other outlets; for instance, they may have a boyfriend/girlfriend and just make themselves love that person because they are giving them something they aren't getting at home. I think a lot of girls that you would classify as "fast" or "a joint" would agree with me on that one. These girls do whatever it is a guy wants just to get some love and attention when they should be getting it from home. At this point in my life I'm fine with not loving people, especially in my family, and in result, I have welcomed people in my life that mean more than what my real family means to me. They know that I love them and I know they love me, not only because we say it, but we show it too. There's so much more to life and to love than what they world makes it seem. Love is deep and if you don't know or have to second guess if someone's in love or loves you, then it's not love.

I'm interested in hearing your opinions. What do you think?

l o v e . l i v e . i n s p i r e . = e l l e . e l l e . e y e .


  1. JAZ said...:


  1. Jaz said...:

    Okay I'm back and this is a deep question. i never thought about this and I just think that you choose to love who u love. I mean i tell people i love them even though I really dont. Like distant aunts and stuff, but i love my immediate family. i think it depends a lot on how you were brought up. and i agree with you on the part about girls being fast to replace love they havent had from home. but like i said before, this is a tough question. Ill have to call you on this!

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